In the past few weeks I've been reading Staring at the sun - overcoming the terror of death by Irvin Yalom. This is a quite interesting book. Yalom talks about the existential fear of death and the stunning effects it might have. Actually he talks about the liberating effects frea of death might bring. Staring death in the face is like staring at the sun. It isn't possible to do for more than a moment for it will be blinding. The difference is that staring at the sun has a devastating effect where staring in to the face of death can be liberating. Learning that life has an end can bring great meaning to everything we do. Typical for this book is the following thought experiment, quoted from page 187. This thought experiment is ment to help you give meaning to your live by realizing its shortness:

Stare directly at the sun; take an unblinkered view at you place in existence; attempt to live without the protective railings many religions offer - that is, some form of continuation, immortality, or reincarnation, all of which deny death finality.

Though I don't always agree with Yalom, this book is a must read for pastors and everyone who has patients suffering from the existential terror death may bring. Yalom puts a lot of his own meaning system in his book. These are mostly the parts where I disagree. But this is normal, i guess, even healthy. Yalom has a lot of respect for people with different meaning systems as his own and, for a theologian like me, this is just interesting. I always think that personal stories, stories about meaning, are valuable and beautiful.

The book constantly reminded me of a patient I visited during my internship in a hospital. I met a man in one of the intensive care units of the hospital. He was in his forties and very ill. A lifetime of drug abuse killed his lungs and he was unable to move much without the use of extra oxygen. Though he was this ill he was mostly joking with his colleague patients. He kept talking about his son and daughter (who were both grown-ups). He was afraid what would happen to them if he wasn't there anymore. After a few visits he found rest with the care of God for his children, he even asked me to pray with him. He was overtly afraid of death. I think that Staring at the sun would have helped me to uncover more of his fear; maybe I could have helped him in a different way. The pastoral relationship and counseling did help him, I think that I'll recognize his anxiety faster.